Olivia
Posts:13
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One of the hottest topics being debated
at the moment by numerous friends and colleagues is that old bugbear:
money! Or rather, it's not money that's the topic of
conversation, but rather the lack of it...
Delve under the surface though, and it's clear that there's something
else going on. In each debate on the subject, there are three
underlying, fundamental issues...
The
first is self-worth. Until we value ourselves, nobody is going to
value us. Do you - beneath the surface - genuinely value
yourself? Do you feel that you really do deserve to receive abundance
- or is there something deep within you that you feel ashamed about
and which (unwittingly perhaps) you're continuing to punish yourself
about? What better way to make yourself "pay" for your crimes than
keeping yourself short of money!
Take a look around you. Are the people you hang out with flying high,
being creative and receiving glorious abundance? Or are they scrimping
& saving and moaning about how there's not enough month at the end of
the money? The people around you mirror what's going on within you.
Watch them and learn!
The second is not setting clear enough boundaries. Of course,
boundaries and self worth are very much interlinked...until we value
ourselves, we don't feel we have the right to keep anything for
ourselves. Instead, we give it all away to others - and then become
bitter when we're left with nothing. (I've played
out this particular pattern many times in my life...it's not pretty!)
Of course sharing, creating interdependence and basing life on an
attitude of win:win IS what it's all about - however, being
over-generous, refusing to receive and living life on a lose:win basis
isn't spiritual, isn't clever and certainly isn't how it's meant to
be!
The third is fear of disappointment. Every single one of us hates
disappoinment - it's a kind of horrid rejection with no-one to blame!
Because disapointment makes us so uncomfortable, we choose to both
deny and avoid it - with the result that we don't dare actually ask
for what we want! And if you don't ask, you don't get...
But the paradox is that when we don't articulate what we want -
whether it's on an energy level, using our imagination or asking
someone for something - we automatically guarantee our disappointment.
We have no chance of getting what we want if we don't make it clear
that we want it!
UNTIL WE ASK FOR IT, WE WON'T RECEIVE
IT!
But the trick is to ask for it in the right way! Most of us whine or
manipulate (at some level) to get what we want...and yet we hate it
when people whine or try to manipulate us! There are two ways to ask
for what you want...but be careful!
To ask for something from someone takes courage, humility and
strength. Base all your requests on win:win and if you're faced with a
particularly difficult conversation, set the intention in your mind
that you want the "wisdom and guidance to create the highest outcome
for all concerned".
It's worked miraculously well for me - even (or maybe especially) when
I've been faced with particularly loathesome conversations!
Interestingly, I find myself taking a bird's eye view on the matter
and find myself coming out with far more creative solutions than I
would have otherwise. TRY IT!
To ask for something on an energy level actually achieves the
opposite! Why? Because the Universal Law states that "like attracts
like" - so whatever vibration you're giving out is the one that you'll
get back. Asking for something which you don't yet have is tantamount
to focusing on what you don't...yet have! And what you spend your time
focusing on, thinking about and feeling is what you create. So be very
careful what you spend your time thinking about!
On an an energy level, to receive we must focus, imagine and feel as
though it's already ours. The feeling part is the key. It's our
emotion...and emotions are powerful! Think about it: e-motion = energy
in motion. Emotions are only experienced on this plane...and they're
there for a reason. And the reason is that - when used for creating
and manifesting - our emotions make things HAPPEN!
The difficulty is that you can't fake it! The Universe responds to our
real thoughts and feelings - and if deep down you feel that you don't
deserve good things...then you won't get good things. And that of
course, brings us full circle to our number one cause of lack of
abundance: lack of self worth! So...the whole point of the mystery
tour of life is about learning to value, honour and indeed love
yourself.
Then -
and only then - will you have accessed the secret to abundance...and
to well, LIFE!
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| Posted: 30 Jun 2008 11:18 Back to top |
Olivia
Posts:13
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From Kate:
A book that I treasure is Attracting Abundance with Emotional Freedom
Techniques (EFT) by Carol Look.
It is packed full of excercises and also helps us to blow out any
issues that may be holding you back from accepting that abundance is
possible.
I watched The Secret and again was amazed that this is still a secret
and that the rest of the world hasn't 'twigged. I think it's great -
I'm sold on it anyway!
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| Posted: 30 Jun 2008 13:00 Back to top |
Olivia
Posts:13
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From Ceri:
I know what you mean. It is so hard to put a value on yourself but at
the same time we value other people's services. When I have to prepare
a quote I try to think of myself or service as if it is being provided
by someone else and what I would be comfortable paying. I find this
helps a lot.
Love the site
Ceri
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| Posted: 30 Jun 2008 13:01 Back to top |
M de Groot
Posts:2
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Wow it is a subject very close to my heart and it has been one that
has appeared for me throughout my life. Now I am not into blaming
parents although I do need to go back to my time growing up around my
mum who always said that 'you can't take it with you' and managed to
spend a decent amount and then my dad who was a very strict dutchman
who had spent most of his youth in hiding during the war and found it
very hard to spend money on anything and always claimed there was
never enough to go around. Also being 1 of 4 children there was indeed
times when we did not have much. My clothes were always handed down
from my mum's best friend's son, who although younger then me was very
obese and as such when he grew out of his clothes, they would fit me
perfectly. So most of my younger years I never had new clothes. Guess
what happened when I started earning money! You go it, I spent so mch
on clothes it was stupid. I have gone through life always worried that
I would not have enough money despite the fact that when I was
married, with both of us working in top jobs, quite frankly earning a
fortune between us even at today's standard and still not having
enough money at the end of the month? What was all that about?? So
interestingly although I spend so much less then I used to, now that I
have started my own business, it is hard to make ends meet. I just
wonder how many of these old memmories are stored in my neural pathway
to do with money? Thank you Olivia for asking the question, it has
really got me thinking about what I need to do differently in my
thoughts! Bless you! Michael XX
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| Posted: 12 Jul 2008 13:23 Back to top |
Andrew Ferguson
London
Posts:2
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Money's a great place to learn whatever the next lesson is, isn't it?
One thing I've found helps is to accept what I'm feeling about it.
There's only one thing worse than feeling bad about money, and that's
feeling bad about feeling bad about money! So it's the old sequence:
Acknowledge, Accept, Allow, Invite. Acknowledge what's going on;
Accept that it's OK it's going on: Allow it to be there (and notice
what happens to the feeling when you say "You're OK" to it!) ... and
then Invite the feeling you want to have in.
The same applies to 'what money represents to you', which will define
your particular nightmare around money.
I've also found that when I stop having a problem about asking for a
sum of money, my clients stop having a problem with it. Hmm!
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| Posted: 05 Nov 2008 17:58 Back to top |
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